Being a long time bull I have learned much over the years. Each couple is different, but some things are pretty universal.  Women, while they knew their husband thought they were beautiful, being desired by other men was even more validating to them. These couples negotiate boundaries, both mutual and individual. They share their deepest secrets and sexual desires. While there bond is strong, m any come to realize monogamy is not a reasonable goal for them. They knew themselves well enough to say, "This monogamy thing doesn't work for me" — and as a result, were able to negotiate marriages from a place of self-acceptance and self-knowledge. While this type of relationship won't work for everyone, for many it does. I personally feel, that it is important to be able to talk to your partner about what you both expect in terms of sex, your turn-ons, your fantasies, and what your level of comfort is, with what the other person may desire.  Exploration in an otherwise heal